Getting divorced is not ideal for anyone; however, as well all know, it happens. My grandmother would have said that it’s a compromise we make for God and our children to remain in a relationship, but in order to love our children, we have to love ourselves first. Staying in an unhealthy relationship doesn’t teach them love by any means.
To take the bull by the horns and decide to start all over on your own is not an easy thing, especially when you have been strongly dependent of someone else for so many years. Suddenly, your responsibilities have doubled and even tripled! You feel empowered and strong, but there is one monster you don’t want to deal with: the lawnmower.
For the first time in your life, you try to turn on the lawnmower only to realize that no matter how much of your strength you use to pull the cord, it just won’t work. Then, after watching a hundred videos on YouTube, you think that you may have found the problem, so you run to a store you’ve never been before and start looking for something you’ve never laid eyes on before. After a 10 minute talk with a customer service agent, he recommends lawnmower oil, which he delivers right to your hands. You have the power!
Back to the lawnmower challenge. Feeling excited about the whole adventure, you decide to empty the whole bottle of oil into the lawnmower, just because in your mind, more is always better and you don’t want to worry about re-filling the tank for a long time.
To your surprise, your time-saving theory doesn’t apply this time. You have flooded the lawnmower machine with oil which, by the way, is coming out from everywhere. Now is the time to learn something new: there’s a basic rule for lawnmowers. The ratio is one to ten, oil per gas.
Because you won’t give up and every mistake is a learning opportunity, now you look for more info on YouTube only to realize that you can open the whole thing and clean it on your own, and you do it.
Yesterday you were just another divorced woman trying to mow the yard, now you know that you are much more than that. You can break the lawnmower and then fix it like a pro. (Thanks YouTube)
Finally there comes the moment when the lawnmower starts working, making a lot of funny noises and dark smoke, but working. With an oily tear rolling down your cheek, you push it with all your strength and you are doing it. You are mowing the grass on your own.
You’ve faced and conquered your biggest fear. You are strong, you are independent, and you are beautiful. You don’t need to stay tied to a hurtful relationship just to avoid facing the lawnmower, because you are the worthiest and smartest person in the world. And in those moments when you’re not sure if you can do much of anything, you will remember that you conquered not only an unhealthy marriage, but the lawnmower as well.